11:58 p.m. - 2018-02-03
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For the past few seconds, I've been sitting here and thinking.
Why can't I let go of the things that hinder me from being the man that I want to be? I just don't know how to change the things about me that stops me from growing.
As long as I'm living and breathing, I can change things. It doesn't matter how old I get or how many things happen in between my desire to grow, it can happen -- right?
On to other things...
My niece and nephew stole some money from my mama and I replaced it. I made the mistake of telling people about it. They said that I am always trying to fix things when it comes to my mama.
Truth is, I'd do anything to ensure my mama has an easy and stress-free life. I don't want her to have to worry, she has given me so much and now it is my turn to try my best to do the same for her.
The money, it doesn't mean anything. I'm somewhat young and able-bodied, so I can earn more money. I just don't like that the fact that people are obsessed with money.
Over the years, I have gotten stingier. It was a point in my life when I would have given a stranger $20 without hesitation, but it seems as if life has made me extremely bitter. Working to survive, to make sure your needs are met and that some of your wants are as well... it takes a toll.
Yet, I still think I'm somewhat giving.
I have to study for my calculus test. I have been a little, but I need to study more. I just felt like adding an entry since it seems as if I never do anymore.
